Surreal compliments of the day -
1) "I would beg to see your arms raised in calcification towards the expanding horizon as the minutemen stand before me with their phallic gums aimed and loaded.. "
2) "Seven donkeys and a concubine cannot compare with the tarnished sheen left in your path of combustion."
3) "You have the vocabulary of an aspidistra in panic."
4) "Cry for the stiffness of the earlobe. The turtles are fallen and the rain stands still. How long must I suffer with your undergarments?" (is this really a compliment?)
5) "Your nasal hair speaks volumes concerning the Isle of Wright."

Forget existentialism and realism. I want to be a surrealist. The internet. Good times.